Job Market - stage 1
Posted 09-18-2010 at 05:06 PM by EmmyNoether
Updated 09-18-2010 at 06:07 PM by EmmyNoether (grammatical errors)
Updated 09-18-2010 at 06:07 PM by EmmyNoether (grammatical errors)
I often wonder if what ever it is I am doing is going to get me to where I want to be. I also wonder if my perception about myself is accurate. Sometimes I am very down on myself - I'm too fat, I'm too tired looking, I'm not smart enough, my past mistakes will haunt me... Then, sometimes I think I can market myself better than my grad school peers, I know how to work a room and demand attention, I know how to play the networking game and I do it well. As much as it feels good to every once in a while recognize your own talents, I am terrified that the world will get back at me for doing so. I'm worried that instead of logically recognizing my talents, what I'm doing is convincing myself that I'm so much better than I am, and this will lead me blindly to my own downfall.
On this note, I went to a career fair on Wednesday. I had taught for about 2 hours, ran home, donned a suit and heals and ran off to the career fair for 3 hours when I really needed 5. By the time I left, my voice was barely audible and I limped back to my car since my feet aren't used to heals... at all. I felt good about what I did. Everyone I talked with seemed genuinely interested in me since I walked up and advertised myself well. (In addition to being in school since I was 6 weeks old I've done 2 internships (financial and government), worked on projects simultaneously with college for another company (technology), and in grad school I ran a summer program.) I just point out all my key attributes right off - my background involves 4 industries, holistic problem solving, and my math phd. I felt good about who I talked to and what I walked away with.
For me, I pared down my list of potential employers by a lot... since I could ask them poignant questions beyond the scope of my internet search that I had done prior to the career fair. What I think also set me apart from all the undergrads bumping around in suits was that I did my homework and knew what questions to ask instead of scrambling for something that I prayed would distinguish me. I handed out several resumes, but I felt my success was not there. I felt great about 3 connections I made. One was a woman that gave me her business card and wrote down her personal extension for me to call about pushing my application through their company. Another worked for a company that had nothing of what I was looking for, on which we mutually agreed, but he offered to put me in contact with his sister who was doing with her career what I admitted to him I wanted to do with mine. Lastly, I went to the company who houses my dream job... (ahh... IBM Research). Although they didn't have anyone in that department, the person I spoke with took a class from someone who worked closely with that department and gave me her personal contact information. That one still sends my insides skipping! I haven't yet written to her, because I don't know quite how to put my words into writing - I know, seems odd that I say that while writing my blog, but it is true. I want to say something to the affect of, "It's my dream to work there, and even though you don't work there right at this moment, I heard you collaborate with those people, any chance you could get me a job with them?" Somehow I feel that wouldn't be the best way to approach them. Plus, I just find it difficult to write an email that is both personal, professional, and asking for help in a certain way. I will do it this week - it is one of the things on my to-do list.
The other major problem I am having right now is a conflict of interests. It turns out that my mother is incredible with application stuff. She has helped multiple people with their resumes and cover letters and the like. On one hand, if I'm going to apply for jobs that I care about, I want to do so with the best possible application. However, as soon as I open the door to help from my mom, I'm opening the flood gates for my mother to try and control everything about this process. We've already have a "conversation" about what my dream job would be. When I told her that my dream job would be with IBM research, however it would likely be difficult since it is a very insular community and they don't hire very much, she thought I shouldn't focus there but in the more general company. After I argued with her as to my exact reasons, she conceded my point - but the real question is: do I really want to deal with this each step of the way? My mom still sees me as a child and her daughter and I really do feel she doesn't trust me to live my own life. So, I'm debating between getting the job or getting independence. Then again, they aren't necessarily mutually exclusive.
On this note, I went to a career fair on Wednesday. I had taught for about 2 hours, ran home, donned a suit and heals and ran off to the career fair for 3 hours when I really needed 5. By the time I left, my voice was barely audible and I limped back to my car since my feet aren't used to heals... at all. I felt good about what I did. Everyone I talked with seemed genuinely interested in me since I walked up and advertised myself well. (In addition to being in school since I was 6 weeks old I've done 2 internships (financial and government), worked on projects simultaneously with college for another company (technology), and in grad school I ran a summer program.) I just point out all my key attributes right off - my background involves 4 industries, holistic problem solving, and my math phd. I felt good about who I talked to and what I walked away with.
For me, I pared down my list of potential employers by a lot... since I could ask them poignant questions beyond the scope of my internet search that I had done prior to the career fair. What I think also set me apart from all the undergrads bumping around in suits was that I did my homework and knew what questions to ask instead of scrambling for something that I prayed would distinguish me. I handed out several resumes, but I felt my success was not there. I felt great about 3 connections I made. One was a woman that gave me her business card and wrote down her personal extension for me to call about pushing my application through their company. Another worked for a company that had nothing of what I was looking for, on which we mutually agreed, but he offered to put me in contact with his sister who was doing with her career what I admitted to him I wanted to do with mine. Lastly, I went to the company who houses my dream job... (ahh... IBM Research). Although they didn't have anyone in that department, the person I spoke with took a class from someone who worked closely with that department and gave me her personal contact information. That one still sends my insides skipping! I haven't yet written to her, because I don't know quite how to put my words into writing - I know, seems odd that I say that while writing my blog, but it is true. I want to say something to the affect of, "It's my dream to work there, and even though you don't work there right at this moment, I heard you collaborate with those people, any chance you could get me a job with them?" Somehow I feel that wouldn't be the best way to approach them. Plus, I just find it difficult to write an email that is both personal, professional, and asking for help in a certain way. I will do it this week - it is one of the things on my to-do list.
The other major problem I am having right now is a conflict of interests. It turns out that my mother is incredible with application stuff. She has helped multiple people with their resumes and cover letters and the like. On one hand, if I'm going to apply for jobs that I care about, I want to do so with the best possible application. However, as soon as I open the door to help from my mom, I'm opening the flood gates for my mother to try and control everything about this process. We've already have a "conversation" about what my dream job would be. When I told her that my dream job would be with IBM research, however it would likely be difficult since it is a very insular community and they don't hire very much, she thought I shouldn't focus there but in the more general company. After I argued with her as to my exact reasons, she conceded my point - but the real question is: do I really want to deal with this each step of the way? My mom still sees me as a child and her daughter and I really do feel she doesn't trust me to live my own life. So, I'm debating between getting the job or getting independence. Then again, they aren't necessarily mutually exclusive.
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