I sometimes get confused, I can't seem to get mixed messages out of my head.

We are bombarded with messages growing up, work hard, and you'll get ahead, you'll be "OK"

I see the proliferation of homeless people around me, and I often wonder "What the F happened to that person"

I think we are conditioned to think that person is lazy or unmotivated, a "loser" so to speak.

But, is it really that way?

...

People generally think that they are nice. They generally think that as they go through their harried and rushed day. "I'm a good person, I must be, I do X Y and whatever Z may be.

But,.... I've had the realization that I'm not a nice guy.

Well, sure, I'll do the occasional greeting, do the prerequisite nice guy gestures.

But, I have to realize that I'm not really the nice guy that I thought I was.

I ain't bad, I just ain't a real charmer....

I'm an immature assh&le at times. I avoid painful situations......

Mrs. Chow's brother is having many many medical problems. His son, our nephew is turning out to be a real stand up kid, he's in college and he has been handling his dads medical issues pretty well. Much better than I would have at his age. I don't know if this is a generation thing or he just has something in him....

I, for once actually felt at ease giving advice and being "there"..........

The voltage required across the base of a transistor is .8 volts, this causes the flow of electrons to flow from the base to the emitter leg, this increases the amplitude of the waveform that is fed into the transistor.....

That is the stuff that I thought was important.

Not words.

But, words have destroyed and built civilizations..... history is full of examples of this.

I'm like a virgin.... I never knew the power of the written word... I've...

It was a strange morning. We're gonna take out Mrs. Chow's mother today for Mothers day. I get up and go and run a few errands. I get the car washed and looking all shiny. I pull up at the ATM with the stereo cranked. I look over and there is this old weathered looking homeless woman in a wheel chair with a sign that reads place help with some change. I get out of my car trying not to make eye contact with her, as I already feel like a ****** blasting the stereo in a semi nice car. I go to the atm...