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My friend for her second marriage decided she wants to get married on an island in Florida and expects all her family had friends to go. We can’t afford it this year. Plain tickets, hotel, wedding gift etc....her sister has 5 kids and they can’t afford to go either. My other friend did something similar for her 3rd wedding. I think it’s a bit selfish to expect family and friends to all be able to afford all this.
Wish her the best. Tell her you can’t make it. Yes I agree it’s idiotic to expect people to fly out for your wedding. If I flew out to some place it would be fir my vacation.
My wedding was $1800 bucks and had 15 people. That’s wedding and reception. Neither my wife or I wanted to spend a ton of money on the wedding. Christ we knew we loved each other neither needed a giant fancy wedding we bought a house with the money we would of spent. I can tell you that 25 years later we can have whatever wedding we want. Neither of us care to waste the money. We bought another house instead
My wife has a cousin who has been married three times. Her second was bigger than her first. And her third was a big deal, too. You know, after the first time, the glamor kind of wears off.
For YOU. The glamour wears off for YOU, not the couple.
Maybe your wife's cousin has poor judgement that makes you less enthusiastic.
But there are plenty of previously married couples who are clear-eyed and want to celebrate finding the right one.
If someone I care about invites me to a nice wedding, I will go and help them celebrate. If I can’t afford to travel for it, I will decline. If for some reason I didn’t approve of the marriage I would decline also, but I’d keep the reason to myself.
Just as an example, my friends niece got married and had a Wiccan wedding, whatever that is. I make no judgement on how anyone chooses to be spiritual, but if I had been invited I would not have been comfortable going.
If someone wants a big wedding for their 2nd, 3rd, or 4th, that's their business. I won't judge it. It's not something I would want for myself, I hated even my first wedding, too much stress for me. But whatever floats their boat.
Their wedding, so they can do whatever they want to do for their ceremony free from judgment of other people. And just as well, you have every right to politely decline and if you deem suitable, send a gift.
I keep trying to explain to my wife that we don't need to go to every single destination wedding we get invited to. We did 4 this summer.
Their wedding, so they can do whatever they want to do for their ceremony free from judgment of other people. And just as well, you have every right to politely decline and if you deem suitable, send a gift.
I keep trying to explain to my wife that we don't need to go to every single destination wedding we get invited to. We did 4 this summer.
Wow, I can't believe that anyone can even afford four destination weddings in one summer (and, have enough vacation time to attend all of them) !
My wife wanted a "real" wedding for her second one because her first wedding was a quickie by a J.P. with only the two witnesses present.
We had it at my sister's farm in conjunction with her annual family get-together. She wore a wedding gown (check); her sister gave her away (check); her daughter was her bridesmaid (check); my son was the best man (check); we had a flower girl and ring bearer. One of my sister's daughters is a professional musician/singer and two others and a son-in-law are semi-professional singers, so we had lots of great (free) wedding music.
It was nice, held under a tree that was the only "original" thing left standing on the farm after a series of (six) tornados hit it the decade or two before. (No tornados in the 17 years since, so maybe we brought the farm good luck!)
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
9,297 posts, read 4,571,902 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by chiluvr1228
Personally I think having a big thing for a 2nd, 3rd, or whatever wedding is a little tacky. Maybe if the first wedding was at a JOP I could understand it but these people that go crazy with subsequent weddings are delusional.
Why is it delusional for someone to have a big 2nd wedding? Why is it up to you to judge?
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