Safety Questions Re: Ferdinand, IN / Nearby Surrounding Areas (Gary: appointed, home)

[defythenormsBrandon]

Hello,

I apologize in advance for the long post but I’m struggling with taking my family to Ferdinand (IN) and would greatly appreciate all responses. Please share any cautions, area advice or other helpful information related to the visit. Here’s a little back-story so you’ll understand my concern.

My wife is African-American (I'm white) and we have two beautiful children (ages 16 and 19). I’ve never been to Ferdinand or any parts of Indiana except to occasionally pass through on an Interstate. My brother met and married a woman from there and her entire family lives there and now, they have reared their children there for approximately 15-years, and his wife loves it. I’ve always accepted her but my parents have always felt my brother could have married someone with a little more “polish”.

Unfortunately, his wife was uncomfortable with me bringing my family there and expressed concern and fear about what the neighbors may think (area is 99% white). To be fair, this was more than a decade ago. As a result, it created a rife between my sister-in-law and me and so, disgusted and without mentioning it to my wife, Ferdinand became the last place I ever planned to visit. I wouldn’t want to expose my family unnecessarily to a dangerous small town when it is absolutely preventable by not going.

As I write this, I hear my wife's voice in my head saying don’t over characterize an entire area because of a few misguided individuals. I’m a bit more jaded because if I’m getting this type of behavior from my sister-in-law and she claims she is one of the more open-minded; what am I to think?

However, over the last 13 years, my wife has graciously opened our home to my brother’s family and bridged the obvious gaps between both families. Our children get on really well and my nieces and nephews are over the moon in love with my wife. If it weren’t for her, I would not have had the opportunity to grow closer to my brother’s children. Family is important to my wife. She’s from an extremely close-knit, loving extended family and well educated (she’s a boarding school, Brown and Yale graduate). She was reared in an elite part of NY; and has lived in NYC, London, Switzerland and China. While she moves easily in both black and white America...I think small town IN is vastly different. So, I’m terrified that taking her and our children to Indiana will put their safety at risk.

She’s fearless and believes in the humanity and goodness of people. I’m not so confident and while I believe my brother wouldn’t let me put her and my children in harms way; there’s a part of me that wonders if they are simply unaware of the danger. My wife’s family has expressed deep reservations and concern that it only takes “one” narrow-minded individual upset by her presence to cause an unsafe situation. And if she or our children were harmed, it will not have been worth the trip. My parents hate it there and have only visited once but plan to go if we're going. The reason for the visit is my niece’s HS graduation and she has already expressed that she’ll be disappointed if my wife doesn’t make it.

I haven't talked to my family about my feelings, but as we get closer to the date...I'm becoming a wreck.

Please help…the angst is overwhelming.
All tied up in knots,
Brandon

[Johnny Vanderburgh]

You're afraid that your family will be met with violence during a visit to Southern Indiana?

You might get some funny looks from a few natives, but I doubt your safety will be in jeopardy. You'll probably have a higher risk of getting hurt in an accident on the interstate on your way there.

[defythenormsBrandon]

Johnny V. - thank you.

Yes, I’m deeply concerned about violence and less concerned by the natives “funny looks”. A work colleague attended UI and although he had no specific information related to this particular area, he suggested that I do my research before taking my family to “some” parts of Indiana.

[MissingIndiana]

What in the world could this relative have told you to make you think rural Indiana is this violent? Your post makes it sound like you've been told there are multiple lynchings every year. The area is mostly white, so I can agree that you may get some funny looks simply because other races are a bit of a novelty in the area. I grew up in that general part of the state in a very small town though, and never witnessed any violence against people of different races. There were some racial slurs used by a small percent of people, but I also found that the foreign exchange students (Chinese, German, Hispanic, etc) at our school were often very popular and well treated among the other students. We also had a black girl in our class who was an adopted daughter of a local white physician and she was treated just like anybody else.

There are parts of Indiana where racism is worse than others, but it's no more important to 'do your research' before taking your family to visit part of Indiana than it would be before taking your family to parts of most other states (or certain cities for that matter). Honestly, there's about a 0.00000000000000000001% chance of racial based violence happening to your family on a visit to Ferdinand. If you're still super worried about it, you can always just take your family to visit one of the giant monasteries in the area that was built in part due to the solitude and peacefulness of the area (Sisters of St. Benedict Ferdinand, Indiana | TheDome.org)

[Johnny Vanderburgh]

Originally Posted by defythenormsBrandon

Johnny V. - thank you.

Yes, I’m deeply concerned about violence and less concerned by the natives “funny looks”. A work colleague attended UI and although he had no specific information related to this particular area, he suggested that I do my research before taking my family to “some” parts of Indiana.

I'll make you a deal. If something atrocious happens to you and yours while you're in Ferdinand, let me know and I'll be more than happy to balance it out with some genuine Southern Hoosier Hospitality.

[Capt. Dan]

OP--------Ferdinands proximity to HolidayWorld/SplashinSafari theme park,which is visited every year by hundreds of thousands of people of every race,creed and color imaginable,means the people of that area are quite used to seeing multicultural families.I dont think you could pick a safer place to take your family! Afterall,Ferdinand isnt exactly Gary! I hope you have a wonderful visit to Southern Indiana!

[retired rat]

I go to Ferdinand 4-5x a month. Everyone I've met seems wonderful. I will say that a 16 and 19 y/o will probably be bored out of their minds though, if they are used to any sort of city at all. "Cultur" is an overly narrowing word. No opera or symphony in Ferdinand, but plenty to learn about. You may have to seek out entertainment, but so maNY TODAY WANT THEIR ENTERTAINMENT DELIVERED TO THEM.

[defythenormsBrandon]

Originally Posted by retired rat

I go to Ferdinand 4-5x a month. Everyone I've met seems wonderful. I will say that a 16 and 19 y/o will probably be bored out of their minds though, if they are used to any sort of city at all. "Cultur" is an overly narrowing word. No opera or symphony in Ferdinand, but plenty to learn about. You may have to seek out entertainment, but so maNY TODAY WANT THEIR ENTERTAINMENT DELIVERED TO THEM.

Retired Rat…your comments along with everyone else’s has helped me feel much easier – THANK YOU!

You're dead-on about the instantaneous need to be entertained. I count myself very fortunate that we’ve managed to maintain full-disconnect (no cells, tv or computers) during our mandatory dinner/chats together. They’re not easily bored and still enjoy hanging out w/their parents on occasion. We all love history so, MissingIndiana’s suggesting Sisters of St. Benedict is perfect.

[defythenormsBrandon]

Originally Posted by MissingIndiana

What in the world could this relative have told you to make you think rural Indiana is this violent? Your post makes it sound like you've been told there are multiple lynchings every year. The area is mostly white, so I can agree that you may get some funny looks simply because other races are a bit of a novelty in the area. I grew up in that general part of the state in a very small town though, and never witnessed any violence against people of different races. There were some racial slurs used by a small percent of people, but I also found that the foreign exchange students (Chinese, German, Hispanic, etc) at our school were often very popular and well treated among the other students. We also had a black girl in our class who was an adopted daughter of a local white physician and she was treated just like anybody else.

There are parts of Indiana where racism is worse than others, but it's no more important to 'do your research' before taking your family to visit part of Indiana than it would be before taking your family to parts of most other states (or certain cities for that matter). Honestly, there's about a 0.00000000000000000001% chance of racial based violence happening to your family on a visit to Ferdinand. If you're still super worried about it, you can always just take your family to visit one of the giant monasteries in the area that was built in part due to the solitude and peacefulness of the area (Sisters of St. Benedict Ferdinand, Indiana | TheDome.org)

MissingIN -
Thank for sharing your experiences and knowledge about this area.

Thank you for the link to Sisters of St. Benedict. It’s beautiful and my family would love it. In fact, it would be fun to hear my kids’ thoughts based on the European monasteries they’ve toured with us.

Now, to answer your question: on the benign side of things, my sister-in-law has led me to believe, at best, much of the community might find it odd to see an African-American in the area. I’m fine with that since my wife is quite comfortable in her skin and she would hardly bat an eye at being less than 1% of the visiting area’s racial makeup. She has already lived that experience and fortunately, it has been a good experience.

One of the more serious comments was that extremist hate groups are prevalent there. That’s a far, far more serious implication given their proclivity for violence towards minorities and certainly one that doesn’t rest well with me when the only African-Americans will be my wife and our mixed-race children. I’ve never thought about it and it feels ridiculous to have to consider such things.

I would be the first to admit my sister-in-law doesn’t have the best filter and when comfortable, she fails to edit appropriately, but she has never uttered anything as ghastly as a lynching. I’m cringing at such a horrifically heinous thought.

That said, after reading the all positive comments here, it's best to find out directly from her what's behind her remarks. She didn’t exactly say hide by sundown, but I was certainly led to believe there was reason for concern related to violent behavior.


Brandon

[defythenormsBrandon]

Originally Posted by Capt. Dan

OP--------Ferdinands proximity to HolidayWorld/SplashinSafari theme park,which is visited every year by hundreds of thousands of people of every race,creed and color imaginable,means the people of that area are quite used to seeing multicultural families.I dont think you could pick a safer place to take your family! Afterall,Ferdinand isnt exactly Gary! I hope you have a wonderful visit to Southern Indiana!

Thank you, Capt. Dan – sorry, I've never been to Gary, but it’s a relief to get all the positive feedback on Ferdinand! (OP)